Category Archives: gaming

Shut yo preachin’ ass up


I feel inclined to talking about changing the world.

Earth, in its entirety, is capable of extraordinary things. We as a collective energy hold the power to ignite love and light throughout the world, and even out into (out – to? ) the universe.

May we all come together as One. Together we can change our world for the better. If you believe at all in reincarnation, you get we’re energy and upon death that energy disperses and becomes one again with that energy, and around we go again.

So if we’re coming back, over and over again, let’s just keep making it better each time? No? Well I think yes.

It’s not only essential for the universe, but a karmic loop, too. Our souls depend on it. I don’t mean to sound extreme or preachy. Excuse me if I do. It’s meant as a good thing! An exciting time. Imagine what good we can truly do.

I’ve now made a real habit of smiling at everybody I make eye contact with. Both for the good of Earth and the good of myself. You have no idea who it is you’re smiling at, but it’s very possible you could make their day.

I’d like to see us all a little more mindful of other people’s existence and feelings. From our closest, to strangers in far out countries, seemingly another world, in one way or another.

Just to spread a little light. We all need it. For our world. Our kids (remember as well they are our future, and pave the way for all that will become). For all that is.

It’s truly a blessing to be able to experience Earth. Not sure how anybody else feels, but I’m gonna continue furthering that experience with true, whole hearted goodness. Bless.


Days of Gratitude 5


So it turned out I succumbed to the demons of procrastination with my latest ‘days of gratitude’ collection.

Not unlike most projects I start, I never fully committed to the idea, but my general aim was to go with 7 days (I didn’t dare dream of completing them 7 days in a row) of one thing I’m grateful for.

So now, on the 5th ‘day’, since I neglected the subject, I’ll list not one, but  LOTS of things I’m grateful for today. I’ll force my indecisive mind to focus on as many possible and why.

So I’ll commence with


The most obvious blessing, is that of Being. Not just alive on this beautiful planet, but  alive with the energy we are made of, too.

Buzzing with electricity at every moment, creating those moments with that electricity, back and forth, in an infinite track of energy.

Utilising and expelling that energy into an existence, a soul, life on a planet, life on this planet, a human (or any form of being), a cell, a molecule, an atom, a particle, a photon, a quark…. and back out as energy all over again.

I am so friggin grateful to be alive. It’s truly an honour to be blessed with this experience.

My Dad

My Papa is my ultimate hero. My rock in life. The endless support he offers me is amazing. More than amazing. He is a knight in a shining armour of lightimage

The sky And trees, so we can breathe.

The ability to transmute thoughts into energy and form, whether processing an idea to create our own reality, or putting words on to paper and writing something new.

The ability to speak, see, walk and feel. I love that I can feel other people’s energy.

The prospect of having a child. Yep, I said prospect. To bring a being into this world and raise and protect it, to mould the way to a fantastic person, who could almost definitely change the world, in one way or another. To have that BOND, that human connective sense. That to me seems like an exciting prospect.

Hoodies, tracky bottoms, gaming, Destiny 😑… the immersive world of video games is a reality within, and upon itself. Existing within the 3D Earth, viewable to us through monitors, hooked up to.. electricity.

And finally (today)

For waking up..  today in my bed, and everyday my mind to how Earth is being manipulated by the few, at the detrement of the many (and the planet herself). And love. And everything that comes with it.


5 fulfilling fings I gone and done in 5 weeks


Once again the demon of procrastination has embedded itself into my being, writhing at my fingertips, convincing me that creativity exists but only as an impervious venture.

Through its relentless clutches I’ve yet again withdrawn from writing, or even drafting. Not one word has reached the paper (or screen) in the past six weeks or more, and I’m left feeling oppressed, indisposed and unfulfilled.

Or, I’ve just been a lazy twat again. Either way, my Hippy Van has been neglected, as has my poor cerebrum.

So where has this hippy been? Fighting the crime of injustice in the streets of LC? Standing up for human rights at various protests across the country? Offering my spare time to aid those less fortunate…?

Alas, I’m afraid to admit, only within the confines of my mind-computer. Another way to describe it would be in my daydreams. But I’m confident my self-discernment will allow me to progress sooner rather than later. Though one could argue that’s been my hope for quite some time now.

But I do have some things to bring to the table, which I’ve engaged in during my time AWOL. Bare with me, as I think when such activities/experiences finally evolve to their destined fruition, my absence will have been felicitous and righteous.

So, you gorgeous strangers who have given your precious time to read this, here are 5 constructive things I’ve done in the past 5 weeks:

1. Stopped smoking weed


Byebye smokey laundry day 😦

That’s right, I finally broke up with Mary Jane. I’m clean 4 weeks yesterday and some of that misty, nebulous mind-fog is starting to clear. Replaced by an incandescent gleam, one that I’d almost forgotten could exist.

Don’t get me wrong, Mary Jane is the one true love of my life and I miss her dearly everyday…. but for now at least, I have to steer clear. SKUNK bares too much restriction upon the intellectual capacity (and I did miss that part of myself). Also, it was neccessary to clear my head for a while in preparation of number 2, which is…

2. Done training for volunteering

It took a few weeks to complete, but hopefully from next week I’ll be spending my two spare days a week helping ‘disengaged’ youngsters gain some qualifications and self belief. To be honest, I am struggling as to whether I’ll be able to support them fully with entering the ‘world of work’, since I’m so disillusioned by the entire system… but my greatest intention is to instill some confidence and self belief into them. Make them remember (or in some cases, realise) that they have worth. That the world is a place they can fit in and be accepted, despite what (fucked up) past issues may have contributed to their lack of self worth.

3. Rebuilt the bridges with my BFF

The Yin to my Yang, we fell apart a little since 2015 hit. But neither of us really left each other, and now we’re stronger than we ever were. And I can finally function again.

4. Revealed my darkest, lifelong secret

To my BFF, the only person I’ve ever divulged this information to. And what a huge weight off my shoulders… to sum up, some bad shit happened when I was very young that I repressed for almost 25 years. Now I feel I can breathe far easier.

5. Almost reached level 32 in Destiny


OK, so the last one isn’t that constructive (depending on your perspective)… but I have met some great new people within the social spaces, improved my confidence making new friends and unlocked some awesome new gear… which I’m extremely grateful for.

Of course, the PS4 merely serves as a distraction from the despondency that I felt was my life… rather than let lame reality encroach me any further, I made an impulse purchase and immersed myself within a virtual reality… but then, who says what is ‘reality’, anyway?

I’m pleased to say, just writing this has created a fresh perspective on my ‘life’… deep breath in, equally deep breath out.

Namaste, and peace to you all. ✌:)


Springing Into Spring



I awoke this morning to beautiful morning sunshine, heating my bedroom as it glared through the window pane.

Admittedly,  I was quite rudely awoken by my phone ringing, but that’s my fault for not putting it on silent.

So, forced into consciousness I lifted out of bed and, boosted by the surprise sunshine, sucked up the rays and drove to pick up my hungover housemate from a random house.

And what a day for a spontaneous drive. Upon returning home, I had some brocolli and protein shake. Then jumped on my mountain bike, started my Garmin up and embraced the beautiful outdoors.

Along the canal, into the woods and through the cemetery where my mum lies. Arrived at my friends, had a smoke and played PS4, (caved to a Cadbury creme egg), then rode back again as the sun set.

Refreshingly serene.

And in the wake of a lot of personal tribulations that have been going on/off, it was just what my body and soul needed. Combined, I was filled with a fresh light.

A good friend visited yesterday and performed acupuncture on me (my first time). Five needles in each ear, one for each pressure point linking to a certain part of the body. Interestingly, the only one that even hurt or bled (a tiny amount btw) was the point linked to stress and anxiety (the very top).


As soon as each needle penetrated, I felt my body tingle from head to toe. Literally the meridians were twitching and I felt the release. For the next 45 minutes I lay alone in silence, concentrating on my breathing in a half meditative state. It was pretty daymn cool man. Heck, later that night I even managed to put pencil to paper and draw something after about nine years.

The days have merged with one another in such natural splendour. A week and a half ago I made a life changing decision, and so am dealing with certain repercussions now. But the sense of freedom I gained from taking that step (so far) outweighs any negative comebacks, which are always only temporary anyway.

Actively encouraging my mental clarity, along with sustaining a clean diet, daily yoga and weight lifting, I’m really starting to feel myself healing from the inside out.

And today, the warmest I’ve experienced since winter took hold, was one of the most perfect days to do so. So a good day overall!

Much love and light all ✌💓

If Time is Relative… Can We Make it Stop With Our Minds? … Clocked It.


If a wristwatch is called a wristwatch. . It implies you can watch time. As does a clock, being named so implies that you can ‘clock’ time. And if you can watch and clock time as such, this must use a lot of energy.. For surely it takes a lot of concentration to watch the entire world changing all of the time?


What is ‘time’? How did it come to be what it is today? Different cultures embraced different concepts of time, and arranged their calendars as so. Some concentrated heavily on planetary movements and lunar cycles.

Our set up of 24 hours in a day… did it just naturally come to be? Or was it strategically put in place to create an ideal in, just one example,  an economical sense?

‘Science’ tells us that time is relative. We understand this as we have all experienced time. It only exists in as far as the subjective experience exists. Einstein gifted this to us with his theory of special relativity.

Even Google’s measurement of one year, 365 days, isn’t actually a whole round 365! It’s actually equal to..


We all know the saying,  “time flies when you’re having fun,” right? When you’re truly enjoying the moment you’re in, living in the present and directing all your awareness to one central, definitive moment (and the next moment, and the next, and the next..), then the concept of time ceases to exist. And only does it reintroduce itself when the said experience ends, or you’re supposed to be “somewhere else” by a certain ‘time’.

That’s why we clock watch at a boring place, like a lame job, for example. And the more you look at the clock, the more time literally feels like it’s not moving. It appears to come to a halt, ceasing to exist!


So imagine if we all lived in a world where ‘time’ didn’t exist as a physical experience at all. Everybody’s actual earthly experience would be far higher… up in the air, as it were.

There are lots of ways for humans to experience time. I personally feel our 7 day week doesn’t work. Definitely not any more. The pressure to work 40 out of 168 hours in a week. If you get enough sleep every night, you’re using up another 56 hours a week.  That leaves 72 hours to actually enjoy life (not including getting sustenance). Can you imagine how fast those 72 hours go, in comparison to the rest?! Especially the ones where you’re bored out of your face. Relative to the 40 working hours,  those 72 will be probably be gone in the blink of an eye.

I’d even propose a mix up of day/night activities/sleeping patterns. For health’s sake.. you know. But that’s another subject.

P.S. if it’s true time is speeding up, as many people of religous faith believe (and those that say every new year “that year went faster than ever”), will it soon be too fast for us as humans to comprehend? And what happens to our bodies and our consciousness at this point?!

I’ll depart at this point. Ramblings can only go so far before they’re lost to the vacuum of space. 😄

Namaste my good people, peace the world over and goodnight.


August 2014- Another Conscious Shift


I felt another shift this weekend. The ones that I’ve become increasingly conscious of over the past year or so; where I can literally feel a turning point in evolution.

It’s not something many other people around me seem to experience as intensely as I seem to. Like yesterday I could feel so much positive energy buzzing around me and expanding outside my house, across the city and Earth. But my housemate shrugged and said he feels the same. That said, I know myself I felt something.

Even the most miniscule shift is a shift all the same. It sparks a little something inside me when it happens, like a bright ball of hope glowing inside.

It’s also a full moon weekend. Unsure if that is of any significance,  my inner self seems to think it probably is; no coincidences and all that.

But I’m so grateful for these moments. And they also go a long way in my personal growth. Like gaining wisdom. As if I just collected a Soul Upgrade in the video game of my life. I feel more connected to my higher self when it happens, which could only naturally be a good thing.

Namaste my friends, and continue enjoying your beautiful lives 💞

Net Neutrality and the Theft of the Internet


The way my mind recalls, is that I was fortunate enough to be granted access to the glorious Internet as soon as it was sweeping into the realms of the lower classes. 

I was age 12 and given my first real taste of the W-Waves at a schoolfriends’ one Friday evening.  That night my dad picked me up and I told him I’d been on the internet and it was amazing- the next day we went and bought a modem and he manually put it inside our second hand machine (Windows 95).

I think I recall it was a 56kb, decent for the time, when we still dealt with the screechy dial up ring tone. After about a minute you’d be connected to the world wide web (whilst sacrificing the luxury of your telephone land line,  of course). And only after 6pm,  because that’s when it was free, otherwise it was charged by the minute.

So I was fortunate enough to be provided with the beginning of a world of knowledge (and experience) at my finger tips. And I didn’t even have to leave the house- perfect for a shy, inconfident, youth.

But with the lack of confidence also came inquisitiveness and opinionatedness. Now I’m the first to admit a lot of my early online days were spent on game websites and chat rooms. But a lot was also spent creating personal pages and news/stories/videos (attempting) to upload,  and eventually creating my own Web pages (maybe shockingly,  basic HTML is the only other language I know).

And then suddenly in the next couple of years the Web exploded, and I’d gone from the only poor kid with Internet to most of the poor kids I knew having Internet too.


I pause as I write now.. write, type, tap. Whatever the motion is called now.. but my thumbs hover above the touch pad on my phone, with lingering thoughts of grey clouds rolling over the waves of the Web. Pondering on where the whole ‘Net Neutrality’ move is going to take us, tasting history happening before me.

If history happening makes sense, then stay with me. As we consider what access to specific websites based on who is able to pay the most tokens (£money).

Where is this new ruling going to leave the websites unable to fund their own running, or control high volumes of traffic, for example?

I don’t know. The whole thing seems a little whispery at the moment,  like there isn’t an awful lot of information,  but it also feels what is being distributed is going somewhat unnoticed?

Like I say, I’m not sure. All I know is, I feel at the end of the trickling of resources and funds,  the ones going to be left thirsty and lagging are those without the funds. So it’s likely we’ll see a decrease in open information and the free sharing and access to such information.  Which will coincidentally work well for the mega corporations, who’ll be able to afford to force on us even more influxes of shiny merchandise and things us sucker consumers may want to swap our hard earned tokens for. I withold the urge to ponder on the advantages for the Government with regards to this.

I’m of course still staying as positive and optimistic as possible.. so optimistic I’m putting some of my hopes on some revolutionary minded millionaire to fund the running of websites for opinions – come – uprisings.

Once again,  unsure of the full implications that are yet to come of this, but the whole thing is certainly shadowy (shudder).


Consciousness and Video Games: Do they make us better Revolutionaries?


Many theorists explore the idea that we ‘create’ our own reality. Whether through positive/negative outlook, karma, or just believing wholeheartedly in the power of the Universe, we are constantly using our minds to make changes around us, consciously and subconsciously.

When we play video games, we enter another reality. Essentially it is possible,  consciously speaking, to leave reality (whatever one perceives that to be) and enter a whole new one. Books, with their magical use of language,  have the same effect- they take us into other worlds.

Recent reports about young adults in Japan imply they have ‘gone off’ sex- or opted out- in favour of Apps and new MMORPGs that instead allow them to have ‘relationships’ within their games. According to these people,  it is way more worth it than conforming to Japanese traditions that essentially ‘trap’ some people into lives they do not want to live.

So they really are choosing games instead! And if you don’t believe me, read the report here:

So what is the connection between VG’s and consciousness? Well, think about when one is really immersed in a VG: fully into the game, on an 8 hour session. You are literally ‘living’ nowhere but in that game. You only ever ‘pause’ to eat and excrete, as those are the human body’s (or vehicle) most basic needs- the rest is all upstairs. I presume bouncing along some kind of electrodes in the brain cells or something, but I don’t know, I’m not a not neurologist nor a physician, unfortunately in this case.

But I do know what it is like to be immersed in a game. Three days straight playing GTA V and one cannot help leaving the house after that much gaming and looking around for a car to ‘steal’. I also turned out a decent aim when I first tried clay pigeon shooting and at the time I couldn’t help but think it was down to all the Resident Evil 5 I’d been playing.

The difference from books is the way we consume VGs’s, and their dependency on your conscious reaction to fulfil the true experience. You can’t ‘play’ a game without consciously controlling it. It is a requirement.

L1 to aim, quick!
R1 to shoot- but don’t waste your ammo!
Make every move count.

Games such as Heavy Rain even broke the consciousness barrier with the entire structure of the game being based on you- the main character- making decisions. Such decisions are then reflected within the narrative of the game, right through to the final scene- your actions as a gamer have consequences.

The Last of Us topped my fear meter like no game ever before. The blockbuster effects and realistic gameplay immersed me. For the best part of 24 hours my life was that world. A game that insists your first ‘kill’ is putting a dying man out of his misery is one that would surely resonate.

I believe VG ‘experiences’ stick with us, in our memory banks like ‘real’ memories. Of course they don’t follow you around everyday to the point where you are actually stealing cars or shooting people for the hell of it. But, if the world as we ‘know’ it did go to shit, or we were in a zombie apocalypse, or there was revolt and we had to learn to survive without and against authority, us gamers would certainly be contenders in the survival game.

So do VG’s make us better Revolutionaries?

I’m sure most of you who bother reading this will do for a reason and will have had similar experiences with VG’s or consciousness, or both. Many say COD inadvertantly recruits young men for the army (read into that what you will), thus, the connection between VG’s and consciousness seems to seep through many different levels.

I am making the conscious decision to stop tearing this apart now. In conclusion, it is clear in my mind that VG’s make us better Revolutionaries. But that is just my mind, who knows what goes on in everybody elses?